


Endings

by justpast_thehelterskelter



Category: Doctor Who RPF
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-06
Updated: 2015-04-06
Packaged: 2018-03-21 14:55:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,423
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3696542
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justpast_thehelterskelter/pseuds/justpast_thehelterskelter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Everyone makes mistakes. You just have to be prepared to face the consequences.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Endings

Silence and heartbreak seeped through every pore of her body. Although it was a typical warm LA night, the woman on the back porch shivered, wrapping her arms around herself, adding another layer of protection to the already strong walls she surrounded herself with. She looked out into her backyard, thinking intently. 

She hoped she didn’t attract the attention of her daughter. Her daughter didn’t need to see her like this.

She hoped that she could be left alone. She hoped that everything in the past few days had just been a horrible nightmare. 

It wasn’t.

Everything had been going well, so she thought. Her relationship with her co-star, while risky, had been the happiest times of her life… well, besides the time she spent with her daughter. She figured, with the hand life had dealt her so far, she deserved a little happiness. A little time for fun and love and no regrets.

How wrong she had been. 

Things had spiraled out of control so quickly, she was still reeling from the aftershocks of it. After she had stormed out of the apartment, catching the nearest flight out of England, running home to her daughter, to be far away from the man she had thought she loved. Her mind was a constant whirlwind of pain, loss, emptiness as their last moments together constantly replayed through her head. 

 

_When the news broke, she was stunned. She could forgive him a lot of things. He was young, bound to make a few mistakes. She could be understanding. But this! The one thing she knew, in her heart, she could never forgive, was the one mistake he made. If she could call it a mistake. He didn’t even have the decency to tell her himself. She had to hear it from the media. Her phone had exploded with texts from Arthur, her sister (who had never fully approved of her relationship with Matt), and even Karen had sent her a message._

_It wasn’t until she had gotten online that she realized why they had all called._

_“The Doctor, Mrs. Robinson, and his Mistress?” screamed up at her. Beneath the headline was a photo of Matt, her Matt, her boyfriend, locked in what looked like a very passionate kiss with someone, she didn’t know who. She didn’t want to know._

_The photo was grainy, but it was definitely him. His arms were wrapped around this young, thin, leggy blonde, and they were kissing like the end of the world was near._

_She closed her eyes, hoping this was all just a nightmare, a horrible dream conjured by her own insecurities. When she opened her eyes, she was dismayed to find that it was real._

_From the bedroom, she heard noise. He was awake. She sat, frozen, in front of the laptop as he made his way out to the living room. She heard his footsteps stop directly behind her, as he saw the display on the screen._

_“Fuck,” he swore quietly._

_Alex still didn’t move. She couldn’t. She couldn’t bear to see the look on his face._

_“Is there something you’d like to tell me?” she said in a low voice. “Because now would be the time.”_

_She heard Matt heave a sigh but say nothing, so she turned to look at him._

_The pain in his eyes matched the pain she was feeling and she had to look away. She couldn’t look away._

_“I’m sorry.”_

_He said nothing more. There was nothing left to say._

 

“Mom?” her daughter had come out onto the back porch as she had been lost in thought. “Are you alright?”

Alex didn’t know what to say. Her sudden appearance at their LA home had been unexpected and her daughter was smart. She knew things weren’t okay. 

“No, baby, not really,” she said. “But you’re here with me and I feel better.”

Her daughter nodded. 

“I’m sorry, mom,” was all she said.

Alex nodded. 

“I’m sorry, too, sweetheart, but it is what it is,” she replied. “Now, enough of this brooding out here in the dark. Let’s go inside and watch some mindless television.”

Her daughter smiled and went back inside, and with a heavy sigh, Alex joined her. 

The next few days felt like an eternity. Alex didn’t really feel like leaving the house. The picture of Matt with the other girl, whoever she was, had quickly become international, and Alex knew that there would be people itching to get a photo of her, of her reaction. She felt no desire to give them what they wanted. 

She spent most of her time baking, talking with Salome, and avoiding her phone. She knew she was being childish, she couldn’t continue to run away from this situation; she just wasn’t ready yet. 

She didn’t expect that he would continue to call. She figured he would hopefully give her some time to think before they talked. But the calls and texts didn’t stop.

_Alex, I’m sorry._

_Alex, I’m sorry. I miss you. Please_

_Please Alex, talk to me_

_Alex, please._

She couldn’t do it. 

Every time she went to pick up her phone, to give him a call, she hesitated. She didn’t know what to do. 

 

A week after she had left England in a hurry, there came a knock on her door. She was startled out of her daze at the sound. She knew it couldn’t have been Salome, she was at her father’s. Everyone else who knew she was in LA was in England. Which left either Karen or Arthur. She sighed, and got up to answer the door.

But it wasn’t Karen.

It wasn’t Arthur, either.

No, of course, the bloody idiot himself had to show up at her doorstep and knock on her door, like he hadn’t been the cause of her inner turmoil for the last week, like he hadn’t just broken her heart. 

He looked at her somewhat sheepishly and cleared his throat.

“You wouldn’t answer your phone,” he said hoarsely. 

“So you decided to fly out here?” she said in disbelief. “Christ, Matthew, what the hell were you thinking?”

Alex ushered him inside her house quickly and shut the door. 

“And take your shoes off.”

Matt hastily complied before following her into the living room.

“Look, Alex, I can explain,” he said hastily.

She shook her head.

“At this point, Matt, I don’t want an explanation,” she said. “I don’t need to know why. I just needed to…to…” 

She struggled to find the right words. 

Matt looked at her hopefully.

Alex let out a huff.

“I don’t know what I needed,” she confessed in a small voice.

Matt was instantly by her side, but she moved away, distancing herself.

“I can’t.”

And with those two words, Matt deflated.

He sank down onto her couch with his hands over his face, the picture of remorse.

Alex fought the urge to go to him, to take him into her arms and tell him it was alright, it was going to be alright. 

She cleared her throat and sighed.

“Look, Matt,” she began. “You can’t just fly over here and expect that after a week I would… I don’t know.” 

She threw up her hands in frustration.

“I have never been so… so angry, and hurt… in quite a while. I need time to-to process things, without you here. You flew halfway around the world, you stupid man!”

She began pacing.

“You know what, Matt?” she asked. “I don’t know what to say to you right now. I don’t know if I ever will. I do know that you being here isn’t helping me right now.”

She stopped pacing and looked at him fully for the first time. The pain in his eyes mirrored hers.

“I think you should go,” she said quietly.

Matt just gaped at her.

“Wha-but? Alex?” he said. “Why?”

She was crying now, again, batting away at the tears fruitlessly.

“Because, Matt!” she practically shouted. “It hurts!”

She let out a strangled sob.

“It hurts to have you here,” she continued. “It hurts to see you here, because I can’t get that look on your face out of my head. Because the only thing you could say was ‘I’m sorry!’ Because you did the one thing I trusted you would never, ever do to me! And it hurts.”

She sighed, shoulders slumping, turning her back to him.

“Please, just go.”

He didn’t say anything. She didn’t turn back around until she heard the sound of her front door closing. 

And then she cried.

**Author's Note:**

> *hides* sorry... sleepless night due to personal relationship woes made my brain spit this thing out. it (sort of) goes with my other work, Beginnings, and there will probably be one more part to the story line. let me know what you think :)


End file.
